Big blue skies overhead always shrink my struggles.


Big blue skies overhead always shrink my struggles.



When your PT is gracious enough to be available over texts, and you still have the same lesson to learn, again & again.
Den of Positivity, 7.5 mo PO: From a friend’s post about the moon last night: “PEOPLE. I just saw the moon in my new telescope. And I mean in crystal clear precision, so big it didn’t fit in the lens, I had to pan to see all of it, and CRYSTAL CLEAR. Like the pictures you see in books of close-ups of the moon. Craters, ridges of craters in stark relief, valleys, those shocking white spots and lines that look like meridians radiating out from craters – or maybe it was one of the moon’s poles?? How the hell do I know!! And a crystal clear Sea of Tranquility. I could see textures, people, and colors – well, ok, black and white and grey, not exactly colors but MOON colors, and they were stunning. Holy cow I am bad at that telescope and holy cow it is a steep learning curve but I hit JUST THE RIGHT spot with the focus control and it popped into perfect focus – so I learned THAT tonight, go slow with THAT knob or you miss everything, 1 millimeter in either direction and it’s a blob, but it DOES have a perfect place. If I never figure out how to see ANYTHING ELSE with that telescope, that moon is good enough! That telescope is bigger than I am and I got like a dozen new mosquito bites dragging it out to that field and it was totally worth it. That was mind-blowing.”

Ba-HA! Oh, I *love* this.
Lately (6 mo PO) I’ve been getting up first thing to go for my stamina-building walk. It wakes me up, keeps me out of my head, and puts me in a better place to manage the speed & multitasking of breakfast-lunches-get-everyone-out.
Today was humid & hazy, and a gnat decided to circle my head for most of the walk. Hammies were tight & sore & resisting the usual loosening magic of the Stick. I was pissed.
Apparently the Den of Positivity doesn’t allow for pissed off mornings, though, because it sent me signs that I couldn’t stop taking pictures of, culminating with a great blue heron taking flight off the pond at my turn-around spot. I couldn’t get my jaw off the ground fast enough to capture her on camera, but I’ve attached a few of the bright spots that pulled me out of the gnat cloud. It was still humid on the walk home, and my leg still hurt. *And* there are good things in the world. Gotta slow down to see them.




It does get better.
5 mo PO. Towards the end of my walk this morning as I came down this straightaway in the track, I suddenly wanted to break into a run – despite my fatigue & aching hams. I burst into tears with the longing. To actually do it at this point would be super dumb, but I’m going to call it progress. I’d written off running from my life. Must be the new sneaks. I texted my friend to tell her and she sent back this meme. So progress, and patience.


